In a Dry Spell

What happens to over educated nurses who get tired and really aren’t good enough at anything to excel?

I have done some self wallowing this week, because frankly the above question has been haunting me as I have been working on my dissertation. As you can tell, my writing on my not so great dissertation is creating a little doubt and mild dysthymia. After 5 years of pursuing an education that I have no doubt learned much from, including what is good nursing research and writing, I am wondering if I will find a good niche in which to apply this new knowledge.  After all this time pursing this degree it has become quite clear to me that I am not very good at nursing research (honesty and reality are also key things I have learned in my doctorate education).  I wish I were good at nursing research because I love it and firmly believe it is the foundation of improving health care.  Being good at nursing research is about being able to get funded and writing well… You all read my blog and can attest to my lack of grammar abilities and disorganization .

I won’t bore you with all of my hopes and dreams, but my passion for nursing, adolescent health, international nursing education, improved health care access, and passion for students have been somewhat bound up in completion of this phase of my education, but now I am wondering if I will even be able to complete this first step.  Further, once I am done, whether any will want my overly frequent opinions, flight of ideas, certain disregard for rules, and the like within their department, faculty, patients, or students is a legitimate concern.

So, I am not only wondering if I will ever get this degree done, a degree which should be the foundation of a career and not the pinnacle, but if I do complete it what will I be able to do with it?  Further, what happens to those nurses who do not finish this last hurdle for varied reasons even after very very difficult work?  Do they hide, are they fired (most certainly sometimes),  are they disgraced (most certainly as well)? Does anyone even hire such over-educated nurses for cool staff nurse positions? These are questions that nursing, nurse educators, and those of us pursuing such degrees need to be openly discussing.

Sigh… trying not to sound self-seeking here, just pondering these real and legitimate questions myself.  Nothing is certain.  Anyway… I am apparently in a dry spell for writing. Will post again soon. Thanks for reading!

P.S. Current favorite quote – Know the rules well, so you can break them effectively.  — Dali Lama XI